A breakup is usually accompanied by a mix of conflicting emotions—but what if you’re filled with a persistent feeling of panic and regret about the decision?
How do you know if you’ve made the wrong decision or if you’re just in a momentary tailspin of second-guessing that’s normal in the process of getting over a breakup?
It’s never easy to leave a person you care for. So, take a deep breath. Here are a few key things to keep in mind that can help you feel more confident in your decision and begin navigating the difficult process of letting go and moving on.
First of all: Feeling grief doesn’t mean you made the wrong decision.
According to therapist Dennis Nguyen, LCSW, (no relation, by the way!) the feelings of paralysis and uncertainty are a perfectly normal reaction and should be expected. After all, decoupling signifies a time of intense and overwhelming change.
“All change comes with some grief,” Nguyen tells mbg. “When we break up with someone, many folks may see that person less, have to change their living situation, or figure out how to navigate any shared friendships. Humans love routine and patterns—even when they’re not helpful—and to disrupt this can lead to anxiety and fear about a new and unknown future.”
As you’re sorting through your feelings, your mind might be spinning with what-ifs and fickleness. It can be tempting to go back to what you knew and emotionally avoid the pain instead of going through the necessary journey of feeling the emotions and meeting your needs at a higher place.